“You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.”
— Sam Keen
This is not always an easy lesson to learn. It took me quite a few years to learn that my husband loved me for who I am, not for who I wanted him to believe I was. Long before we were married, I tried to hide all of my flaws and imperfections, attempting to persuade him to believe I was someone I was not.
It was an eye-opening and experiential journey that empowered me to understand he could already see beyond the perception I was attempting to portray. He knew my weaknesses, my challenges, my faults, and he loved me anyway. Not once did he judge me because of my self-consciousness, insecurities, issues, or mistakes. Instead he chose to patiently love me, lovingly guide me, and inspiringly teach me to embrace my own flaws and imperfections. He stood by my side and taught me to love myself, accept myself, and be the best that I can be.
His love enabled me to see that while I would never be perfect and it's okay to be flawed, I must still work to be the best that I can be at all times. He has shown me how to laugh at myself and not take myself so seriously.
I often wish these hard lessons that it took me years to learn, had been learned and understood twenty years ago when we first met. I often wish that I had listened to him and embraced the teachings he brought to me on a daily basis. But then I must recall one of the most valuable lessons he has taught me.
"Don't live your life based on regrets. It's the mistakes that you have made that has made you who you are." - Marvin Ramsey, Sr.
I thank Almighty God every morning and every night for my husband, and quite a few other times in between. Even when I'm upset with him or upsetting him, I still thank and praise the Lord for him. By the grace of God and the love my husband has shown, I've been able to accomplish many great things in this life despite the adversity life brings.
But in the words of Jill Scott, "But it’s all because the love you give to me it made me who I are."
The best gift that you can give to your significant other is to learn to love yourself and embrace your flaws. Don't try to be what you're not, be the best you that you can possibly be. Perfectly flawed! And in return, love your significant other for who they are. Don't try to make them into someone they're not, instead strengthen their weak areas, and support their strengths. Love them 'as is.'
It's been another Motivational Monday Moment.
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